Goofs and Gadflies

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Snapshots and Magnets

To the Internet and its Netizens:

There are moments when I walk along a certain stretch of a tree lined street that I can hear the earth breathing. Stripping away the concrete shackles and asphalt baklava, the soil gasps for air in some kind of an oxygenated love affair. Whether the skies be blue or grey, and in warmth or chill, the connection remains strong. There is so much disconnect in life, that each remaining connection must be treasured.

These connections, or rather I could say magnets, provide a structure for understanding the limitations of a logical existence. I now see the world through the eyes of a 5 year old child. His fears (currently its bears) and his love/hate relationship with salad and Chinese pears. There is no semblance of a cohesive plan, just an overwhelming desire to bring toys surreptiously to school.

I am transformed from a tender and loving life partner into a mentor and authoritarian dispenser of snacks and toothpaste (though usually not at the same time). This change is momentary and at any given time I have to balance; my status as a loving and nurturing fiance with my role as a positive male influence. I love it. I love being relevant and meaningful to people in that way. Being thrust into fatherhood allows me to share positivity and issue gentle life lessons in a creative manner. I enjoy having a selfless and meaningful existence. It has allowed me to relate to the other facets of my life and reveal the dynamics of interpersonal relationships.

Authors Note: These collections of words are a lifetime project. Much like the author, I suggest that you not fret with momentary bouts of inactivity or block. People read you (and I) for fractious moments of inspired lucidity, not for a litany of licentious lifestyle foibles. Share the moments where reflections are still and clear. Paint the detailed nuances of scenic syllables in the winter's thrush and the fall's resection. Find those moments of complete satisfaction and relative synchronicity. When you feel anger or disappointment, you should look in the mirror at your tear soaked face and ask yourself this question: "Is this the person I want to be"?

Personal Update: I am engaged to be married on November 4th, 2007. I have found someone brilliantly kind and unfailingly generous with her time and mind. She is a writer, a lover, and a fighter for those who cannot speak. She is a woman of the ages and the inspiration to many who have met her. I offer you not hyperbole but empirically proven facts. She is her mother's daughter, and her daughter's mother. Her mother and daughter are intellectual and creative. I am a very fortunate man to be with a woman who was patient enough to afford me the time and space with which to realize that life with her by my side is appreciably better than I could ever have imagined.

I miss this, the pairing of words in this keyboard waltz. I do hope to see you again soon,

Ryan